When starting the process of transitioning Grayson into preschool, I was well aware that we would be in for some type of fight. What I wasn't prepared for was something that was said to me earlier this week from the Special Education Director. While checking in with her regarding an odd question from the school psychologist (The question being "What are your plans for Grayson in regards to preschool?" A question I wasn't prepared for because it was under my assumption that as my son was being assessed by their school I thought my intention was pretty clear.) She was pretty clear in explaining to me that my concerns regarding what services Grayson would receive should be more broad spectrum instead of simply ABA focused.
Apparently, because of the flow chart the school district follows there is a chance that my son, who while very intelligent, has a clear diagnosis that has been assessed to him by not only a trained professional but a Doctor in the field, may not qualify for any services at all. Not just ABA or Speech but that he may not even be granted a spot in the preschool. She continued to tell me that while she has to let every parent know this, there are some very clear delays (speech, OT, social, these are my predictions for the record) that will most likely qualify him for the preschool program.
Once again she has repeated to me that just because he has a diagnosis, he doesn't have a disability. A statement I am still unable to comprehend simply due to the fact that according to the Department of Education in the state of Massachusetts, "Disability shall mean one of more of the following impairments :(a)Autism - A developmental disability significantly affecting verbal and nonverbal communication and social interaction. The term shall have the meaning given it in federal law at 34 CFR §300.8(c)(1)." http://www.doe.mass.edu/lawsregs/603CMR28.html?section=all#start.
Upon hearing this, I was instantly shocked to say the least and decided that it was best for me to take it to some of the people in my life who have more practice in this situation then I. These people are the wonderful people I work with, for and whom have all been very supportive and knowledgeable in regards to this entire process. Needless to say, while explaining this information to these very helpful people, there wasn't a jaw that wasn't on the floor while listening to my story. My boss Eleanor* (fake name) instantly recommended that I speak with one of our head doctors, who also happens to be one of the bigger names in regards to Autism Diagnosis.
I was hesitant, as him and I have never spoken but figured at this point that it simply can't hurt. So this past Friday, he and I sat down. We had an informal chat regarding my concerns, thankfully Grayson's diagnosis was performed by another member of this doctor's team, so he was easily and quickly able to look it over and consider it. He has since set us up with an appointment with a developmental pediatrician who will be able to assess Grayson's growth and whose report will then be evaluated, considered by the team of doctors and hopefully provided to us before Grayson's IEP meeting in late February.
My lesson for this week boys and girls. You are the best advocator your child can have. Never let them tell you they know what's best. If your son has a written report regarding a diagnosis, from a trained professional, the answer is always YES they need a copy for the file. If you think something they are telling you doesn't sound right, find someone else to ask. There are advocates in every state that can provide education to parents or even a good place to start in regards to your rights. Study up, go in friendly, smiling and willing to listen to what they have to say. But at the same time, know the answer to your questions before you ask them. The first IEP is hardest (says the person whose going through the process) because they want to assess your child in an hour session and pretend they know them. At the end of the day always remember, as their parent you are the person who knows them best and you are the best person to fight for them.
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